Posted on by sufficientgrace4u · 2 Comments

The Faithful Cry

Have you ever cried out to God?  Have you ever cried out when the world is telling you not to?  When the world is telling you literally and figuratively to shut up?

Today in the gospel Bartimaeus cries out to Jesus.  The world and even the followers of Jesus rebuke him and tell him to shut up.  But he continues to cry out. 

And as he was leaving Jericho with his disciples and a sizable crowd, Bartimaeus, a blind man, the son of Timaeus, sat by the roadside begging. On hearing that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out and say, “Jesus, son of David, have pity on me.” And many rebuked him, telling him to be silent. But he kept calling out all the more, “Son of David, have pity on me.” Jesus stopped and said, “Call him.” So they called the blind man, saying to him, “Take courage; get up, he is calling you.” He threw aside his cloak, sprang up, and came to Jesus. Jesus said to him in reply, “What do you want me to do for you?” The blind man replied to him, “Master, I want to see.” Jesus told him, “Go your way; your faith has saved you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed him on the way.

Mark: 10:46-52

The world continues to tell us to shut up.  Don’t talk about religion lest you offend someone else.  Don’t talk about God lest you be told to shut up, or receive looks or are rebuked.  As a society we have allowed the rebukes to silence us. Sometimes we keep religion separate, on the side, an after-thought, something we think about on Sundays. We hide our faith and our love of God, lest we be judged on earth.

Bartimaeus persisted.  Although he was blind he knew that Jesus was all that he needed.  Jesus was more important than what others in the world thought.  I have also been blind.  I go through life often blinded by the world around me. I go to church. I read the bible. I say some prayers, but do I see? I cry out in the quiet of my heart, when I have time, when I get around to it, when the world is not otherwise distracting me or silencing me. But, do I hear? Do I listen? My cry is so quiet, that even I don’t always hear it. (But God does.)

Jesus, son of David, have pity on me.

Jesus, son of David, have pity on me!

JESUS, SON OF DAVID, HAVE PITY ON ME!

Open my eyes so that I see you. Open my eyes so that I see you in others. Open my eyes so I can focus on what matters and what you call me to be, not what the world is shouting around me. Open my ears and my heart, so that I may hear you… and follow.

Posted on by sufficientgrace4u

An Eclipse of the Heart

April 8, 2024. A total eclipse. The news has been reporting on this, hyping it, for over a year and constantly for the last week. People are traveling miles to witness it. It is all anyone is talking about.

All that is going through my head is Psalm 19:

The heavens declare the glory of God; the firmament proclaims the works of his hands. Day unto day pours forth speech; night unto night whispers knowledge. There is no speech, no words; their voice is not heard; A report goes forth through all the earth, their messages, to the ends of the world. He has pitched in them a tent for the sun; it comes forth like a bridegroom from his canopy, and like a hero joyfully runs its course. From one end of the heavens it comes forth; its course runs through to the other; nothing escapes its heat.

Psalm 19:2-7

Many will spend hours today to witness the eclipse. They will travel for miles, wait in crowded fields, and curse at the traffic afterwards. But even with their glasses on, will they really see? Will they witness the glory of God? Will they experience the bridegroom or feel the heat from God’s love? Every day the sun comes up and we take it for granted. God’s truth is poured out all around us, but we do not stop and take the time to hear and to listen. We cannot escape the shining light that He provides, His warmth or His love, despite how much we may try. Today’s eclipse is marvelous and will inspire awe. But everyday is just as marvelous. No matter the darkness of night or the darkness of any storm, the sun always returns to light our way, to warm our hearts. Each spring the deadness of winter is replaced with the beauty of rebirth, green grasses, blue skies, and yellow, red, orange and purple flowers. God’s love and miracles surround us. Every. Single. Day. The Psalm goes on to state:

The law of the LORD is perfect, refreshing the soul. The decree of the LORD is trustworthy, giving wisdom to the simple. The precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart. The command of the LORD is clear, enlightening the eye. The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever. The statutes of the LORD are true, all of them just; More desirable than gold, than a hoard of purest gold, Sweeter also than honey or drippings from the comb. By them your servant is warned; obeying them brings much reward.

Psalm 19:8-12

As we look to the heavens today, I pray that we experience the wonder and awe of our Awesome God. May our souls be refreshed, may our hearts rejoice, and may our eyes be enlightened! May we be in pure awe and know that our God is a might God. Lord, help us to hear… and listen.

Posted on by sufficientgrace4u · 1 Comment

The Love Story

For three days, I have felt called to write. And for three days, I have busied myself in matters of the world instead. Three long days.

At one point, I almost started to write about being lost… but then I got further lost in the world.

Today, I promised God that I would write, but the day once again got busy. And as I was climbing into bed, I felt the nudge once more. And, so… I gave in… a little begrudgingly, as I am tired and it is nearing midnight. I opened the Bible, as I used to do more regularly than as of late. I opened it to a random page and this is what I saw:

“I love you, says the LORD.”

Malachi 1:2

Mic Drop! I am without words. Speechless. And breathless.

What a perfect end to a long day. What a perfect end to a long week. What a perfect start to Lent. And with three little words, I no longer feel lost. And the start of Lent on Valentine’s Day this year makes so much sense. How perfect that God’s love story should start with a heart and a cross. Our ashes, our shame, our regret and His love.

God, Thank you for calling me back. Thank you for reminding me of your love. I hear you. I see you. I feel you. I want to do better. You are amazing and wonderful. I want to serve you and only you. I am lost when I turn to the world. I am found when I turn to you. You are all I need. I want to praise you and honor you. I am in awe of you and I fear ever being away from you. Help me to offer my gifts and my sacrifice with my whole heart. Help me to serve as you want me to serve. I want to be part of your love story.

Posted on by sufficientgrace4u · 1 Comment

Father, Forgive Me

Holy Saturday. My contemplative day. The day of limbo. The day of reflection, of sadness. The world has just finished murdering Jesus. He has not yet risen. The day that he is absent from the world because of the world. The day I wonder whether He is absent from me because of me.

It is easy to read the story of the crucifixion and blame those involved. How could Judas who walked with Jesus betray him? How could Pontius Pilate, who knew it was wrong, allow it to happen? How could Peter, who Jesus chose to build His church upon, who had followed Jesus for three years, deny Him? How could the people choose a murderer over Jesus? How could the soldiers and people along the way mock Him and chant things like: “he saved others; he cannot save himself.” “Let him come down from the cross now and we will believe in him.” “He trusted in God; let him deliver him now if he wants him.”

I used to look down on all of these folks. I would surely do better. I would not be so stupid. And yet the story of the crucifixion is the story of all of our sins.

Judas knew Jesus for three years, I have known Him my whole life. And yet, I too choose silver, screens, and other earthly “treasures” over Jesus at times (more times than I would like to admit). I too provide lip service at times, providing a kiss in public, but betraying Jesus behind closed doors.

Father, forgive me. I wish I could say I know not what I do, but sometimes I do and I do it anyway. Father, forgive me. I do not want a world without you. I do not want my life without you.

Pilate knew that crucifying Jesus was wrong, but he didn’t want to get involved. He didn’t want to go against the crowd. If I had the power to save Jesus from the pain and torture, would I have? I would like to think so, and yet my sin contributes to His pain. I, too, have followed the crowd. I have decided not to get involved when I knew wrong was occurring, because it was easier for me.

Father, forgive me. I wish I could say I know not what I do, but sometimes I do and I do it anyway. Father, forgive me. I do not want a world without you. I do not want my life without you.

What I wouldn’t give to be Peter. To be able to sit with Jesus, talk with Jesus, learn from Jesus, embrace Jesus. He had it all! And yet he denied Him three times. I always blame Peter the most. Maybe that is why I sometimes struggle with the Church, with the priests and bishops, who have it all and still seem to turn so far away. Surely, I will not deny Jesus. Though others may have their faith shaken, mine will never be… And yet… it is. Peter had three years. I have had my entire life. Peter may have been with Jesus in the flesh. But I have weekly and daily communion available to me. Peter did not know or understand the resurrection. I know about the resurrection. I know the Truth. I can read the written gospels and have the benefit of two thousand years of church teaching. Why do I still deny? Why do I still hide my faith? Peter was afraid. Despite all that I know, I too am sometimes afraid, even though Jesus tells me not to be. Even though I know everything on earth is temporary, even though I know that if I have faith, I have nothing to fear.

Father, forgive me. I wish I could say I know not what I do, but sometimes I do and I do it anyway. Father, forgive me. I do not want a world without you. I do not want my life without you.

I am no different from the villains in Jesus’ story. I have betrayed Him, ignored Him, denied Him and turned my back on Him. I have mocked or doubted and I have been afraid. I may not physically nail Him to a cross, but my sins are just as painful. My rejection of His love is just as hurtful as those mocking him on the road. Father, forgive me!

I know it is easy to be remorseful as we are painfully reminded of the Lord’s crucifixion on Good Friday and as we sit today and are assured of the resurrection tomorrow.

Lord, help my heart and mind and spirit be resurrected this Easter. I want to always turn to you. Help me turn away from silver and the fake “treasures” that this world tries to offer. Help me to be strong in my faith. Help me not be turned by the will of the crowd. Help me to lead, not to follow. Help me to share your love and your word. As I look around, I see a world that is run by fear. I know that when I am focused on you, I have no fear. When my faith is strong, I have no fear. Lord, I know that in your hands, I am safe. I know that safe does not mean free from suffering, but that there is a resurrection promised. Lord, give me the strength and faith that I need. I do not want to turn away any more. I don’t want to contribute any further nails, I don’t want to be distracted by silver, I don’t want to live by fear and have my faith shaken. I know that I cannot promise, like Peter tried, that my faith won’t be shaken. I know that I am not strong enough to overcome fear on my own. And I know that I am a sinner and will continue to cause you pain. But I know that Your love is stronger than all things, including nails, silver and fear. Help me Father to always turn to you, to always return to you. Help me to remember you passion for me every day not just during the Easter season. Help me to follow you and not the crowd. Help me to love, as you do. Forgive me when I fail.

Posted on by sufficientgrace4u

Old vs. New

I struggle with the Old Testament.  It seems so different than the new.  So many rules, and anger and “fire and brimstone.”  Its different than the love that pours out of the New Testament.  I have questioned why God seems so different in the Old Testament as compared to the New.  Today I think I found an answer.

Today, the Bible opened to Galatians:

Before faith came, we were held in custody under law, confined for the faith that was to be revealed.  Consequently, the law was our disciplinarian for Christ, that we might be justified by faith.  But now that faith has come, we are no longer under a disciplinarian.  For through faith you are all children of God in Christ Jesus.  For all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.  There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free person, there is not male and female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.  And if you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s descendant, heirs according to the promise.

I mean that as long as the heir is not of age, he is no different from a slave, although he is the owner of everything, but he is under the supervision of guardians and administrators until the date set by his father. In the same way we also, when we were not of age, were enslaved to the elemental powers of the world.  But when the fullness of time had come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to ransom those under the law, so that we might receive adoption.  As proof that you are children, God sent the spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying out, “Abba, Father!”  So you are no longer a slave but a child, and if a child then also an heir, through God.

Galatians 3:23-29; 4:1-7

Initially humans were like infants.  We needed rules and discipline.  We were not able to understand or have faith — so we had to be told what to do.   We needed supervision and guidance.  We were “enslaved to the elemental powers of the world.”  God knew what we needed.  He had a plan.  And when the world was ready, He sent His Son, so that we might have faith, see faith in action, believe and know God.  He “sent the spirit of his Son into our hearts.”  That one is powerful:

“God sent the spirit of his Son into our hearts”

We were ready to no longer be slaves to rules without understanding.  We were ready to live by faith, so we could know God.  God sent us Jesus so we could know Him, so we could have faith.  With faith — we are no longer enslaved to the elemental powers of the world.  The world has nothing on us, on our faith.  How blessed we are to know God.  To live in the time of faith, instead of fear and wrath.  To know God’s love through His Son, Jesus.  To know the Truth.

Thank you Lord!  Thank you for creating us to know you.  Thank you for sacrificing yourself so that we might believe.  Thank you for saving me!  Please send your spirit into our hearts!